A Devil Of An Idea

After attending my Cocktails in Care-homes induction last night (more to come on that after my 1st party next week) it felt fitting to go have a drink, the first place my gal pal and I came across in Bethnal Green happened to be called Satan’s Whiskers, so this triggered a memory of some fab coffee in Barcelona at Satan’s Coffee Corner and another of a rooftop bar I happened across on Instagram last week; they liked a pic, I liked their name – Naked for Satan.

So what’s with all these satanically named hipster joints? Is it now cutting-edge-cool to stroll over to the dark side sipping a Manhattan or organic coffee? It got me thinking, and Googling. When I searched more broadly, using names affiliated with the devil and Lucifer, the food and beverage offerings are (almost) eternal.

Hmmm I’m curious? Is it just a backlash to the terror most of us were instilled with as kids, face the fear and give it the finger by naming a bar, beverage or food joint after it? Am I drawn to such irreverent establishments because I’ve unwittingly signed up to burn in hell through some mean thought or perhaps because I swear too much?

What worries me is that I’ve really enjoyed my libations within Satans not-so-fiery abodes.  Am I a bad bad girl?  Oh well, I think the damage is probably done now so no point worrying about it.

There are pages and pages of venue’s on t’internet but these are my favorites:

  • Lucifer Fondue – Great idea, fondue is probably what every tortured soul in Belgium needs.
  • Naked for Satan – ‘Er, it’s not what it looks like, I’m naked for Satan!’ Read the story behind the name on their website its totes endearing. Oh and if you’re in Melbourne, check it out!
  • Satans Whiskers – no witty segue just lovely staff, gorgeous cocktails, uber cool vibe.  #IheartLondon
  • …and of course, the one that started all this Satan’s Coffee Corner in Barcelona

For the record, I’m not into satanic worship and no cute fury animals were sacrificed in the writing of this post – although there was that chicken, for lunch.

Laters navigators. x

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The darkside of the web.  I’ve just spent far too many hours trying to educate myself of spammers and malware and nasty little bot’s who’s main aim is to be a pain the the arse.  I’ll never get that time back and that is a travesty!

This all came about after I started receiving multiple notifications every day that ‘so-and-so had tried (and failed) to log in’ to my blog.   At first I tried the head in the sand method to fix this, sadly that didn’t work so I had to research and download plugins and figure out to use them.

Time will tell whether they’ll fit the bill, from what I’ve seen online this will be an ongoing battle….like fleas, or cockroaches, or damp proofing, or weight lose, or….any other shitty reoccurring thing you can imagine.

So, if you are a genuine subscriber and things are looking a bit hinky – please email me, I used a firm hand with the blacklist, you may have gotten caught up in the crossfire.

I’ll update this post once the installed new measures have had a chance to prove themselves.

Laters navigators

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“The truth is that the way other people see us isn’t about us—it’s about them and their own struggles, insecurities, and limitations. You don’t have to allow their judgment to become your truth.”  Quote -Daniell Koepke

We are the only ones that can allow others to make us feel small, most people struggle with this from time to time.

A conversation and a compliment I recently received have been playing on my mind the last few days.  OK to set the scene, I was in a pub on Friday night and met a few friends of friends; it was one of those nights that ended up back at someone’s home and continued into the wee small hours.  About half way through our night one of the women I’d recently met was telling me that when she’d first seen me she was blown away by my presence and (I struggle to say this) beauty.  I mean obviously that’s a lovely thing to hear, I don’t see myself that way at all, make-up and an outfit are all just smoke and mirrors.  Anyway, that’s not the point, the point is, she was wowed by the fact that I was ‘all that’ (in her eyes) and amazed that I’d graced little ole her with warm conversation and happened to be a nice person too.

I should mention that this woman was attractive, married, had a great job working for a charity and a genuine cool person.  She was someone I was instantly drawn to as interesting and was curious to find out more – why would someone with all that have such low self-esteem? She seemed to see herself as a fragile flower blossoming under my suns warm rays.

Compliments should make you shine and I’m sure that’s how it was intended but seeing through it to her lack of confidence has unsettled me. I can’t seem to let it go.  I’m not famous, haven’t done anything great in life, am of no great intelligence, why the awe?  Hmmm….. light-bulb moment, perhaps it’s down to how an individual defines worthwhile qualities??   I have things I would like to achieve in life and if I see those in others I’m impressed by them…usually not to extremes but I guess I can see the other side now.

Top Tip: One of the best lessons I’ve ever learnt was in a community college acting class, they taught me how to walk tall and pretend how to be confident.  My brother then showed me that when you’re out in a club dancing, happy and lost in music, cool people are drawn to you – we always had a nice smiley group around us after a while.  It doesn’t matter how well you dance, what matters is that you are happy, enjoying it and projecting that.

So, the trick to confidence?  I think – only ever be yourself but try to be the best of yourself and let that be enough, don’t second guess it.  If someone doesn’t ‘get you’ move on, don’t let it bother you too much, there are plenty of people in the world, you’ll find your tribe if you get out there and do the things you love.

Later Navigators

 

Quote courtesy of tinybuddah.com – if you ever need a pick me up, this blog is caffeine for the soul.

 

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Evangelising & Mother Daughter Role Reversal

My mother and I are on different pages with regards to religion, to be honest, we’re not reading the same books… I’m still questioning which book to pick up. I just don’t know, questions questions! But we accept our differences and I try to be patient with all her church stories.

Mum’s an amazing woman, she’s kind, loving and supportive. She knows all the homeless people in her area by name and when having a clear out at home she’s been known to ask if ‘said homeless’ want whatever she no longer needs – they sell it or give it to friends in need. Mum’s a pensioner and an ex-NHS medical secretary she doesn’t have much in life except family, God and Catholicism and that’s fine by her.

So anyway (I’m getting to the point here) Mum is a wonderful woman & she’s heavily involved in the church. I went to see her the other  night to help with some IT related problems and we got talking about evangelising….

I’m all for religion if it gives someone peace, a sense of community and encourages them to be a better person – but there are a lot of rules… and someone knocking at my door or accosting me on the street, hmmm, well I’ve been dismissive of that in the past and if someone catches me on a bad day I may have been blunt a time or two. Now I’m conflicted. Those sweetly deluded bible bashing, happy clappy dears forcing their parable-laden scriptures on to me with well-intentioned righteousness…well, they’re probably someone’s Mum, they could be my Mum.

What started all this was Mum announcing that she was thinking of doing this church thing where they go up to Manchester for 5 days with no money and no phone and rely on God’s grace to sustain them. They may have to sleep rough, though it’ll be in the summer (so at least there’s that) and whilst on the road they will be evangelising. My knee-jerk reaction was – “please don’t do this, it’s insane! I understand the desire for adventure, honestly I do, but you’ve had a double knee replacement, once you get down on that pavement you may never get up again, people might be mean to you?!” …then I lost my words, gulped half a glass of wine, looked at her with wide eyes and stuttered a bit.

It’s hard when you have to let your parents go off and do things that you think are bonkers, this is payback for the worry I put Mum through in my 20’s. I have to have faith in her and ‘be cool’; if it all turns to shit I’ll be there to give her a hug, make her laugh and get her through it.

Mum’s need to help others and stretch her understanding of humility despite having only a basic pension to live off and an already simple life, its beautiful and I’m grateful for these lessons in kindness.

I have been brought up to believe it’s everyone’s duty to give back to the community in any small way they can. Obviously I’m not gonna try turn people to my idea of what god might be (once I figure out if or what that is) but I can help.

Here are my immediate plans so far:
· My friends are involved with Cocktails in Carehomes, I’ve signed up for an induction and hope to sing a few songs and have a gasbag and a tipple on a monthly basis – playing to my strengths.

· I’ve signed up to abseil for St Mungos help the homeless charity in June.

· As part of my music making 50% of all profits once recording costs are paid for (max £500) will go to charity….this one’s a bit limp as there are a lot of works in progress but that’s something I hope to build with this blog.

· I have a single to release, it’s a mash up of a few tracks I originally created for a party so I cant make money off it for copyright reasons, but surely the powers that be wouldn’t take money from Woman’s Refuge would they? The song needs some finessing and I need to find some money to do that but it is a priority.

I’m far from the woman my mother is but I’m trying to be a better person. I’d be interested in hearing what others are doing in their communities around the world. If you’re involved in or hear of something cool, let me know?!

Laters navigators x

 

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Little Box Big Box

Apparently (according to this lifehack.org article) the one sentence that makes you become a really boring person is ‘I don’t mind’ and an ‘I don’t mind’ attitude tells the other person that you have no mind.

I’m not sure about that sweeping statement, perhaps it’s best left under the rug….but it did get me thinking about one sentence that I really dislike and the validity of my dislike.

OK so picture this, you’re at a party and start chatting with someone you’ve just met, at what point is it ok for them to ask you what you do for a living? Is it ok at any point?

We all put people in boxes, isn’t it better to get to know someone a bit more first before categorising them? I’ve met plenty of fun IT people but if they led with ‘I’m an IT executive’ (let’s be honest) we may well look for the quickest exit strategy “oh, (guzzle guzzle) my drink seems to be empty, I see my friend, ah busting for the loo, I’ll be back in a bit”.

I’m often curious about what people do for jobs but personally think the question ‘so what do you do’ is lazy. How about if someone is dressed in an interesting manner you complement their style? Or if they’re nicely tanned ask if they’ve been away as they’re looking so lovely and healthy – compliment, learn, find out about people by connecting interests, it’s much more rewarding that slotting someone into the ‘what they do for a living’ box.

Alright this may well be because I currently work in an office and am not proud of my position, but I’m pretty sure I’ve always felt like that.

I confess, I’ve been at parties and had ‘the’ question asked only for people’s faces to go through a stroke-like fade to boredom when I reply I work in a finance office on reception – I don’t even blame them.
I used to be a florist, people were always interested in hearing about that, or the phase when I dabbled with jewellery design and worked in a Shoreditch boutique – so much more interesting. Yes, I sold my creative soul to the big man, and honestly he’s looked after me really well; I’ve learnt a lot from the environment and the high achieving people I’ve been exposed to….oh dear I’m justifying and digressing all over the place.

Anyhoo, alls I’m say’in is – I understand the need to put people in social and intellectual boxes but have a little fun with the foreplay of it.

Laters navigators

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